Ah yes, the term is over.

I finished my last exam today, at 10PM central, what a feeling it was to be done. Overall I think I did alright on most of my exams. There are a few iffy ones but I think I really pulled my act together in the last month of school.

My first three weeks were my most relaxed, and unknown at the time, the most crucial. Frosh week was full of watching the CSI Marathon on Spike TV. I ended up being called, "TV Guy" by some of the house residents. I had so much time to watch TV because I didn't sign up for any of the frosh events, resident or faculty. Frankly I came to this school to learn. I didn't plan on really getting to know anyone so I could get work done. Too bad I "don't have that kind of personality."

It all started with the opening cermonies where everyone and anyone was allowed to participate. I figured, "Hey, why not participate in one event.". After that was over I had thought I had gotten all my, "Whoopee, school spirit!" out of my system. Oh, but then the residence frosh program started hosting things like free movies in the field with free popcorn and pop. I mean, who could give that up? Especially when I just walked in and no one checked if I had paid for Frosh Week [I eventually got caught.]. Once again I thought, "Alright, seeing as I don't have those Frosh wristbands, I can't get into anything else anyway.".

But then came Monte Carlo Night. The one night where everyone dresses like they're pimpin' up the undergrad next to them and it's all good. I of course couldn't resist to fancy myself up even though I didn't plan on going. Being the super suave and sexy stud I am [har har har!] it was just a given that I was to be snuck in. Oh the night was filled with lots and lots of blackjack [for fake chips]. Then there was Toga, and then there was the festival day or whatever the crap it was called, and then the closing ceremonies where I broke down and showed school spirit.

So then it was just a given that I must get to know people. The first two weeks of classes were simple, go and learn. Sure there were the few odd weekly set of questions to do but there wasn't much, "I can do it later.". Suddenly BAM. Week three kicked me in the fucking jaw with metal cleats. Labs had started, mandatory tutorial, quizzes. What the crap! Where did all the time go? Those weekly problem sets that I could "do later" ended up being pushed aside. I had been getting in assignments and quizzes etc. in on time but I just never had time to do the problem sets. I lie. I had time, but after all the long hours working on other crap, you just want to do something else.

Ah, Billiards. What's one game of pool, ten, fifteen minutes? Suuuure, why not.
*fast forward an hour*
"Oh, looks like it's time to work."
"Let's go eat."
"Alright, fine."

You can guess where lots of time ended up going. Soon enough I was getting on average about six hours of sleep a night.

That dropped to four.

Midterms were creeping up. All of a sudden people thought, "What the flying fuck? I don't know any of this crap." and thus it reflected on midterms. Now everyone was in the "Hrm, shit. I need to get working." mood but as there was no break to catch up people still fell behind, myself included. It was an endless struggle to catch up with the occasional productive weekend or Thanksgiving break to do so, and the occasional unproductive weekend to kick you back down a rung. Sleep became something we only dreamed of [haaaa. lame joke.]. The second round of midterms were a mixed blessing. This time around people knew what was expected and did better in some, but just as bad or even worse in others.

Failure is something that people experience in life. Failing in life is something that people don't want to experience. The University of Waterloo is filled with some of the brightest minds from all over. Many are used to being able to breeze through academics without a sweat. Many began to see that it was no longer so.

I've learned a lot from my first term of university. I can probably say I've learned more non-academic related though. I have experienced living "on my own", a new environment, a new life. I have been pushed and pulled around physically and mentally so much that I have been torn up and mended back together only to be savagely ripped apart and beaten into the ground once more. I've been through hell and back, from depressions to joys. My mind and body have been put through a gauntlet.

For a while I was scared that I was going to fail. My average was under the requirements to stay in my program and the future just didn't seem bright. All my life's work to reach this point were going to be for nothing, all because I couldn't manage my time well. A life's goal was shattered.

Little did I know, others were experiencing the same. Others were getting poor marks and others were scared of failing. I had met many that had already given up on the prospects of applying to the School of Optometry, the same goal as mine but perhaps maybe not their life goal.

In that time, somewhere between the anger in myself and the tears that were shed I had an epiphany. I had found in myself a strength that the others I met may not have shared. I found persistence. I wasn't about to just give up like everyone else. I want to be able to achieve what I want to achieve. I want to be that Optometrist. I want more free dinners. haha.

For the past fourteen days I have been studying non-stop. I had improved my study habits ten-fold, perhaps because I forced myself to or because I had eight exams in nine days. Either way I changed my ways. My brain hurts [it literally does]. Now that the term is done, all I can do now is hope that my last ditch effort pays off and I'll be seeing the grungy buildings of Waterloo for more years to come.

If I could go back in time and tell myself what I would be walking into I would. If it I could tell others I would. Perhaps someday I will.

With this end of term post I shall leave the rest of the details for later times and wish the rest of you the best of luck on all of your classes and exams.

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind."
- William James (1842 - 1910)