Everything will be okay...

It will be okay, Justin. You can fight it in court. I'm okay, I really am.

Thank you for caring so much.

We've come a long way...

Yep, as Jeff would say, "Still Alive". Back from our two night camping trip to Two Jack Lakeside in Banff National Park. Campsite 73 had the coolest tenants of all. Us of course, duh. :)

Here's the pics of our camping trip, but none of the videos made:
Camping - Two Jack Lakeside

So as you can notice if you looked at those pics, it was sunny going to Banff. Just as we entered Banff it was like a wall of black. Nice and rainy. We found our site, set up our shelter, ate some food, bunkered down in the tent for a game of Sociables and then slept.

A damp night and a bruised hip later we woke up for some lunch by Vanessa followed by failed attempts to start a fire and lounging in the tent. Dinner was the same as lunch but not nearly as tasty seeing as having fried coldcuts twice gets a little bland. Sometime between all then I took some time out on my own and wandered by the lake. Just some time for myself to get away from everything and be alone with my thoughts. Got some nice pictures too I guess...

And then Sociables again. I took a nice long walk around pretty much the whole campsite while it was getting dark [almost got lost] and got back to start a fire with Jeff. We got it going as everyone else stayed in the tent so Jeff and I spent a few hours by the fire talking about anything and everything. A good meaningful conversation to wind down the night, camping, and partly some aspects of the summer... When the last coal went out we headed in to sleep. This time around midnight.

And then make things quick, an even damper but much comfier sleep later [air mattresses, yay] we wake up, pack everything up, head to McD's for some nutritious breakfast/lunch, and then home.

It's all over much quicker than you think.

As many things else are...

snarglezzzpfft.

Bluh, dead tired. up 20.5 hours on 4 hours of sleep. Not terribly bad but I have no idea what time I'm supposed to get up to go camping tomorrow. Shrug.

Anyway, quick post. Today went to work for last shift. Good stuff. Went to dinner with JoAnne at Joey's Only where Justin was "working". Met Jamie and Jocelyn at Chapters and headed to Schanks to say hello to Darti where we also met many other fellow friends. Went to Jamie's after with Jeff and met Caitlin there. Jamie and Joc did a little "recovery drinking" while Jeff, Caitlin and I stayed sober for we have early-ish plans. Yep, watched some old Belvedere Lip-Syncs and part of the Greece trip video from grade... nine? [I didn't get to go. >:( ]

Anyway, post later after camping. [Back on 26th.]

Until then. Or maybe tomorrow...

EDIT: Oh right, check this out More fun pictures from the Woo

The New Butteryorkfly Minute Effect

Second last shift was good. Four quick hours.

Anyway, went to Rogers with Jamie and Jeff to pick out some movies to watch. We grabbed New York Minute and The Butterfly Effect. Jocelyn joined us at Jamie's where we had a shmorgusboard(sp) of snacks. Candy Trail Mix, popcorn, chips, pizza pops. We decided to watch The Butterfly Effect first and then end the night with the humourous Olsen sisters.

The Butterfly Effect was pretty good. Quite the unique movie I must say. I'd suggest it to others to see [so go see it]. New York Minute was a good laugh. Sure it's obviously a not an "A" movie but it's enjoyable. lol I was disappointed not seeing my mom or my grandmother which were extras in the parts that were filmed in Toronto. The scenes most likely got cut or I just didn't see them. Oh well. [My grandfather is in The Corruptor. woot. He's the guy in the middle of the scene playing mah jong when they enter the mah jong parlor thingy.]

It was nice to spend some time with "the girls" although we were missing Caitlin... Cleaning your room can wait, you've got lots of time ;). Hugs to Jocelyn. :(

Ha. Random thought, everyone's name started with a "J" but mine. Jamie, Jocelyn, Jeff... Eric... lol. I'm so lame.

Anyway, last day of work tomorrow [well, in 5 and a half hours]. Night.

Sigh...

Air Canada
Flight #: AC 122
Depart: Calgary SAT Sep 04/04 10:10
Arrive: Toronto SAT Sep 04/04 15:57

Air Canada
Flight #: AC 173
Depart: Toronto THU Dec 23/04 12:00
Arrive: Calgary THU Dec 23/04 14:13

Yep, flight's booked for when I leave home and when I come back. I'll probably stay for the ten days or however long Winter Break lasts for... Don't know what there will be to do while I'm back, what will change, who's still sticking around etc. It'll be interesting.

I've got two more shifts to go at Zellers. Sometimes I kind of wish my last day was a little later, like the 31st or something. However, working today just didn't feel the same. It wasn't as "fun" as it normally was. I don't know what was different, perhaps I just had one too many asshole-of-a-customer come through my till in the morning. Then again, my last two weeks of work were probably the most enjoyable. It's probably just the comparison of then and now that's making work not feel so fun. I don't know what I'm going to do with my time off. I guess I do have a bunch of packing to do and possibly cleaning up before I leave.

I've been debating on the whole "parting gifts" for people. A few months ago I was thinking it was a sweet idea, but when I think about it, it's not really goodbye. I'm not never going to see them again - atleast I plan on seeing people again and keeping in touch. I'm sure I'll lose touch with a lot of people, I just hope it doesn't happen with the ones that matter most. Only time will tell.

I got an old webcam last week which to my delight works decently. Every once in awhile it freezes and just cuts out, but it still serves it's purpose 99% of the time. I was surprised how happy I was to have a webcam. At first I wanted it just because it was something I thought that would be fun but the more I used it the more I realised how much closer you can communicate with people. Rather than just staring at a blank window with occassional words popping up you can see a person's emotions and reactions. It brings life to a conversation that can feel so dead otherwise. It makes the conversation more personal. Although, when they can only see you and you can't see them, it feels kind of odd. Oh well. Perhaps bringing a webcam to my dorm will be a nicer, more personal way of keeping in touch with people.

Well, I can't think of much else to say. It's going to be an odd 13 days left... hopefully all goes nicely...

My seatbelt failed me

So life takes a big twist. One moment everything's all good, the next it's thrown through the windshield. Well, I guess not that dramatic.

Tomorrow [more like in a few hours], my mom leaves for Toronto for six weeks for family matters. Along with her own luggage, she is taking a lot of the things I'll need for living all alone in Waterloo. So pretty much overnight a big chunk of I guess, me, is gone approximately 3500 kilometers away.

I gotta say, I really did not think moving away was going to be such a big deal... or this hard. Not more than a half a year ago was I thinking I couldn't wait to move. Now I pretty much think the opposite, but I guess for different reasons. I still think that I'm lucky to get to continue my education at the University of Waterloo and I'm grateful for the opportunity, it just I wish some things could be different.

Just trying to think of things to pack up is hard for me to do. It puts me in a sad, if not sour mood. I start to think of other things, like just before I move, when I move, and after I move. What will change? What will stay the same? What do I wish could stay the same...

I think I'm starting to jump to conclusions in my mind. I'm beginning to do as I always did before - over analyze everything. Instead of just carrying on in the moment I'm thinking of worst-case scenarios, the worst possibilities - pretty much just making myself feel down.

I fear the worst. Really, it's not the worst. "Trust me... You'll live through this" Thanks. It really puts in my head the realities to my situation. Sure, in a few years I could possibly look back and either forget about this all or it'll just be another memory... but I can't help but worry and fret and tear myself up inside because it's happening now. It's not something I'm looking back on, it's in my face, at this second - I have to experience it right now. Right now it's what matters to me.

I'm happy, I truly am. Atleast I was. To be honest I don't think I could have said that many times before, if at all. Perhaps some could think I'm thinking too highly of the moment, and that really, I shouldn't be flying so high for one thing shouldn't mean so much to me. Perhaps they're right, and perhaps they're wrong. All that matters is that I really am happy and they can't take that from me.

But it has been. Not by someone or something, but by time. It tears me up inside that things turn out the way they do. Who knows, maybe what I think the scenario is, isn't. Perchance what I believe would be great would happen. Others like to say that there is that chance, and that it's not something that would easily not happen. I like to hear it but when I think of the realities, I just don't think so. This could be overwhelming to others. Maybe I should have kept all this to myself. Maybe I'm just making it all worse.

All I have left is to fear the worst, over analyze the situation, and jump to conclusions. Of course, the times when I'm not doing any, I'll be happy.

Time just goes faster when there's so little left.

Recap

So I guess a recap on things seems like a nice thing to put up on here.

Friday I worked from 12 - 6 and when I got home Darti called about his 18th party. I was feeling quite tired but I decided I would head over a little later on instead of when it started [7:30]. I figured I'd find a way there when I wanted to go. So I'm sitting there watching the Opening Ceremonies to the Olympics in Athens and I look at the time. It's like 9:45. I'm like, "Oh damn!" and I jump in the car. So I'm driving and then I realized, "Wait a minute. Darti moved... Fuck." I turn around and head back home. As I get home, Jeff and Jocelyn call me and want to just hang out. Jocelyn didn't end up going to Darti's because it was so far away and none of us knew directions/wanted to drive there/everyone's probably already wasted so we headed to Denny's.

After some good catching up [She was in Germany pretty much the whole freakin' summer. lol] we headed to her place for awhile. We played quarters, I made an urgent call to Sarah's cell at around 3:30AM [really, I HAD to call. ;)], and watched a bit of... Lizzie McGuire. ha...

I worked at 9:30 the next day, pretty tired when I got up but the day went nicely. Not too busy, not stressful at all. Had to work with Eugene a bit. [Only us cool Zellers workers know who that is. lol ;)] When I got picked up, my brother and my mom tagged along with my dad and we ended up sticking around at the mall for an hour and a half or so. We checked out some stores, mainly the ones Ian and I wanted to look at [Swarovski, Mexx, Banana Republic etc.] We did some money-less shopping [no not stealing] - some cool stuff I'd probably buy, either out of spontaneity or if I won the lotto [or if it was my birthday].

After, the whole Woo gang went to Tropika for some Malaysian cuisine. Of course, the generous gentleman that I am offered to pay for the meal [yeah, so it was the linked credit my dad got me but it's the thought that counts, right? lol]. Getting home I left pretty much right away to Sarah's place where Vanessa was and where Dickie and Jeff met up after they got off work. It was a nice top-off to a day of work, wandering the mall, and "hangin' with the Woo's".

Today was mine, and also Sarah's day off. After I wasted the day sleeping until 2PM, Sarah and I went to Taco Bell for some non-hot sauce tacos and fries supreme and then to the La Senza "Shopping Party" where Vanessa and Megan worked. Yeah, stepping into the store was a little odd, but after the initial, "tee-hee, I see panties" it was no different than any other store. It was fun to tag along and see what Vanessa and Megan would show Sarah to try on/buy. In my opinion, a successful day of shopping for Sarah.

Vanessa was able to leave work so we went to her place, watched some Olympics [yay!], and best of all watched little baby Sydney. [insert sound of giggling like a little school-girl here] So cute :) Megan got off work and so we headed there to continue chilling out and also met up with Dickie and Jeff. Good laughs, lame jokes [sorry], fun times.

I've gotta buy some of those yogurt+(vanilla or strawberry) granola bars. mmmm. We all headed out pretty early - people work way too early in the morning :). I gotta work at noon for a six hour shift so that's not too bad. I should sleep soon.

On a random note, my mom borrowed a book from the library called "The Metrosexual Guide to Style. A Handbook for the Modern Man" by Michael Flocker. I laughed and read bits of it. Turns out it's actually pretty funny and funnier that some of the things I read I can relate to. A lot seems to be common sense, like etiquette at social gatherings and special functions etc. but I guess I'm not that far into it. I think it's a funny book to have, and also useful seeing as it has things like how to order wines, what to do in "what do I do?" situations. lol Perhaps I'll find it at a bookstore.

Anyway, I'm just gonna stop rambling about stuff because frankly you probably don't care and I just felt like writing stuff down.

It's all memories... good memories.

[Edit: New poll up. Results of the old poll were you all prefer drowning in pee than suffocation by poo. lol]

Good day

Good work
Good movie
Good Wendy's

A good day. :)

And now, good night. zzz

Ups

Yay for the day off. After nine days straight of working, this is quite nice to have.

I slept through most of it to my regret, although I probably didn't miss anything. I woke up at 2:30 and watched some more Alias Season One on DVD [awesome. :)] before heading to Vanya's BBQ with Sarah, Vanessa, and Justin. It was nice to hang out with some of the people I haven't seen since school ended like Dan T, Marty, Laura etc. After watching the finale of Outback Jack we headed to Sarah's place with Justin and Alex where Megan and Jeff joined us to watch Along Came Polly and then Conan. Yeah, I gotta stop breaking stuff in Sarah's house.

All in all, a good day, one of the better days off.

Tomorrow will probably begin with me waking up after noon and heading to work for a non-cashier shift that I picked up with Sarah. Speaking of work, turns out I actually did win the $100 gift card for getting the most donations. Who knows what I'll buy with it, perhaps just for when I want a snack, something for school, or something for someone. I really don't know... what could I buy from either Zellers, The Bay, or Home Outfitters...

Anyway, off to sleep for another day awaits. :)

Confusing doubts

How much control do you have in life? I think the ball isn't in my court at all. Sure, I have the minute amount but really, the ball is on the other side. It's sad, it hurts, but that's the way it's going to be... Enjoy what I can, try to improve on things, and if at all possible, clear things up.

I over-analyze every little thing far too much. It's not healthy.

But with disappointment comes bliss. Hand in hand, they alternate. Perhaps each occurs based on how I decide to use the ball when it's on my side...

The greatness comes not when things go always good for you. But the greatness comes when you're really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes. Because only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.
Richard M. Nixon (1913 - 1994)

(hooray for ramblings... :P)

Long time no bloggy

Let's see... I believe it was the fourth that I spent some time with Justin, Vanya, and Christine. We went to Mongolie Grill in Dalhousie, good shit, and then downtown to watch Napolean Dynamite at the Globe Cinema. That movie is funny. After that we drove to Vanya's in Justin's dangerously underinflated iron van where we played some Boggle and Risk. Justin and I allied up and kicked some ass. I also finally got to meet Vanya's mom. lol.

On the fifth, thursday, I went to work and I think that was about it. The sixth was some more work and then to Sarah's after. Dickie brought some Chalet food. mmm mmm. Poor Sarah and her non-solid foods. :(

The seventh, [today... well, 11 minutes ago] was the re-grand opening of Zellers in Market Mall. Got there around seven in the morning for some free breakfast, then at 7:30 I was on the clock getting paid to stand around and listen to some speeches and get pictures taken. We opened the doors at 8 and it was pretty dead at the mall checkouts [mall doesn't open until 10] so it was nice being paid to just talk with each other. There was something like 177 employees working today, some from other stores. It was sweet, so many people working makes an easy job even easier - and funner. All the breaks were scheduled and we even got KFC for lunch. We also got a free Zellers "loot bag" with some candy and sample stuff. Good stuff. I got off at 3 but did a lot of shopping with my family and got home at 6 :P.

Tonight, Jeff, Justin, Evan, Kris, Robyn R., and I went to Bug's for a bit and then to Evan's where we chilled out.

And now I'm home eating cheesies. Perhaps I'll watch some more of Alias Season One on DVD. More good stuff.

Ciao.

Better :)

Just another "just-lying-in-bed-about-to-fall-asleep" blog.

Today was better in the fact that I wasn't so bummed out about things. I guess I just gotta keep focused on the good and worry about other things later.

Work was easy today, not many customers but time went quickly. Sarah worked an earlier shift than I and gave me some good news that perhaps I may have won that hundred dollar gift card from those one dollar donation sheets. If I do win, a pleasant surprise to something I really wasn't shooting for.

Anyway, gotta work at 11 tomorrow, and good luck with the wisdom's healing quickly, Sarah. :)

meh.

Been awhile since I last posted. Just feeling kinda bummed about stuff.

So yeah, making this quick. Went to Red Deer to surprise Megan for her 18th. Good stuff. Slept in a tent, fun fun. Can't wait to go camping. Uhh... The Village sucks, and moving away is not a hot topic with me. Also Sarah works at Zellers now.

Later.